A Sasquatch's Guide to Summertime Stinkyfeet

If you're a Sasquatch like me, then you probably feel the same conflicting emotions I do at the return of warm weather: jubilation for sunshine and outdoor activities, dread for the stinky-ass feet and countless episodes of foot-shame. 

Over the years I've learned a few tricks...

1. Ventilation! No, not rolling down the car windows or leaving your shoes outside. SANDALS. If you are just a junior Sasquatch, this might solve most of your issues straight off the bat. But if you're full-on abominable read on...

2. Not just any sandals will do. Suede, microfiber, and really fabric in general is not your friend. You need sandals that you can wear in & out of water. Choose whatever brand makes you happy so long as the shoes have an impermeable man-made footbed. 

Why? They are SO much easier to keep clean!! I'm a daily sandal wearer in summer and my Birkenstock years were my stinkiest (the unshaven pits weren't helpingI'm sure ). The combination of suede and cork were a double whammy since neither hold up to water.  The sandals I describe, however, only need to be washed once or twice a week, and if you keep them clean your feet will be almost stink-free. 

There are all kinds of sandal soaps out there but FORGET 'em--they're expensive, have awkward-to-use bottles, and don't even work. I've heard of people using bleach water solutions, but I'd pass on that since it'll damage the shoes and it won't remove grime. The shoe guy at REI uses laundry detergent and puts his sandals in the machine on delicate, but he must not be as much of a Sasquatch as he looks because this method didn't work for me at all. 

Here are 2 things that will actually clean the grit & kill the microbial Bigfoot shiz off your shoes...

A) Dawn dish soap. If it's good enough to wash crude oil off of birds, it's good enough for me. Just use a soft-bristle dish washing brush to scrub up your sandals. This cleans the whole kit-n-caboodle nice and gently, but requires a fair amount of dry-out time. 

B) Clorox anti-bacterial cleaning wipes work amazingly well if you're in a pinch, traveling, or just lazy like me. You win on having nil for dry-time, but it won't clean the straps. 

3. Should you be compelled to wear regular shoes without socks though you be a stink-foot, then only buy shoes with removable insoles. I've found a lot of shoes have foam rubber insoles glued to the bottom of the shoe and are easy enough to pluck out without wrecking anything. You will want to do this so you can pull them out and wash them! The best ones are found in running shoes so I keep the inserts even after the shoes wear out. Wash these in the laundry in HOT after each time you wear them - just like you would your underwear! Which is why I recommend keeping spare pairs from old sneakers. 

I hope this moment of TMI helps prevent some other poor Sasquatches out there from feeling the humiliation that comes with smelly feet! Go forth and walk with confidence!!

~Cristini P, Sasquatch