I got FB un-friended (:^[

I have done my fair share of cutting people loose. I got sober and abandoned my party friends. I refused to carry on friendships with my exes. I even turned my biological father away after meeting twice because he's about 3 cans short of a sixer. So really it's nothing at all for me to un-friend someone on FB for being obnoxious or ignorant. I don't have time for people's drama and I try really hard not to make my own.

Despite this, I was hurt when someone recently un-friended me on FB. It's not like it hasn't happened before. I'm not exactly Miss Popularity, I'm way too opinionated for that. But this time was different because it was someone I spent time with in the real world. Like, frequently. And recently. Someone I was friends with in parochial school, who walked me to school and brought me Tootsie Pops. The same person I had lunch with on Fridays for most of the last year. I even invited my husband along on our hangouts, which, admittedly was super awkward the first couple times. But then we all ate German food, and they talked about beer, so I thought all was well. After my friend got a new job, I didn't get a call or text for a while, so I reached out.  I got a pretty blase response. Then poof, no more friend in my list.

You know, now that I think about it, I have been dumped by friends before. But in those cases, I deserved it because I was a shitty friend and a slutty drunk. And the friends that dumped me did not hesitate to tell me why they were closing the door on me. I respect that.

If you've read this blog, you know I have a penchant for being blunt (in every sense), but I'm certainly not an asshole anymore. So... why? What did I do? Was it karmic? My values? And why am I sitting here wondering why?? I put myself out there, no reservations, but I guess people just disappoint you sometimes. What can I do? (Other than blog about it, which is cathartic, if not productive.) My days of chasing people down and trying to convince them to be my friend are long over. I have actual friends. People who accept me and love me, black heart and all.

As bewildered as I am about being shorted a friend, it reminds me how grateful I am for the people who want to be part of my life.